Monday, May 7, 2012

I miss you! Happy Birthday Dad

That's my dad! Oh my how he loved oysters! One of my dad's favorite things to say while eating these was "I don't believe they are an aphrodisiac because I ate a dozen and only 6 worked!" — I am trying to put on a brave face today and enjoy the sunshine and birds singing. Today is my dad Arthur Beane's birthday and I miss him so much! He came to see me in my dreams last night. I know how lucky I am to have that ability. To see the ones I love in my dreams. I had even made him a cake! I loved baking him birthday cakes! I always came up with new ideas to make for him. He always got a kick out of my cakes! I miss hearing him say "I love you very very much!" I miss teasing him! I miss his jokes. I miss taking him to his doctor appointments. It will be 5 years in November, since he joined my mom and husband. He died only 10 days after my husband and I never cried.I knew he was finally happy again. He suffered so much from the loss of my mom. But, today, I can't seem to stop crying. I know that my entire family feels the same! What a great man my dad was. A war hero, who wanted to be a pilot in the worst way for the Marines, but, after the war he left the Marines to be a police officer in Wakefield, Ma. He soon found out that he couldn't afford four children and his gorgeous bride on the policeman's salary, so he tried to go back into the Marines. They were going to dock him a stripe, which would also make it too difficult to raise his family, so he went into the Air Force. Two weeks into Air Force boot camp, he got a letter from the Marines saying they would take him back and put him in his flight program. Nothing doing (as he would say, he was a man of his word and he gave his word to the Air Force. My parents ended up with seven of us children. They suffered many heart aches in their 62 years of marriage. They lost three babies, survived breast cancer, my dad being hit by a truck, a fire, survived bladder cancer, heart attacks, a stroke... the list goes on. Each thing just made their love stronger. I knew he wouldn't live more than six months after my mom passed. All my friends and our neighborhood loved him. We had a great neighborhood in which we were all like family! I keep in contact with most of them even today. We each have suffered the loss of at least one of our parents. And the parents, all lost a spouse. When my girlfriends came over, they would sit on his lap and play with his hair. He'd get all embarrassed and giggle. He loved to dance. He had flare! I loved watching him dance with my mom and do the polka with his sister Irene. I couldn't wait to grow up and do the polka with my dad after seeing my beautiful sister Teri dance the polka with him at her wedding. She looked like a princess dancing with a king. King Arthur. Growing up, my dad would have us dance with him by standing on his shoes and dancing us around the room. When I grew up, we danced all the time together when ever we were at any function that had music, and, yes, I finally was able to do the polka with him and laughed so much! When I married Gilly in 2002 ( we lived together for 13 years before getting married) my darling father was suffering and had to walk with two canes. He had a crushed bone in his back after he was hit by the truck and suffered all those years in silence. He had told me that he wasn't going to be able to dance with me at my wedding so, the song I was going to have, I just wrote to him in a note. It was Because You Loved Me (Celine Dion).
For all those times you stood by me, For all the truth that you made me see, For all the joy you brought to my life, For all the wrong that you made right, For every dream you made come true, For all the love I found in you... I'll be forever thankful baby Daddy. You're the one who held me up, Never let me fall. You're the one who saw me through, through it all. You were my strength when I was weak. You were my voice when I couldn't speak. You were my eyes when I couldn't see. You saw the best there was in me. Lifted me up when I couldn't reach. You gave me faith 'coz you believed! I'm everything I am Because you loved me! You gave me wings and made me fly. You touched my hand I could touch the sky. I lost my faith, you gave it back to me!! You said no star was out of reach. You stood by me and I stood tall! I had your love I had it all!! I'm grateful for each day you gave me! Maybe I don't know that much, But I know this much is true~ I was blessed because I was loved by you!!!
Of course it made him cry and then on my wedding day, he decided to dance after all with me. It was to Through the Years. It was the last time he danced.
I love you so so much dad and miss you beyond words! I was blessed because I was loved by you


  1. I am sorry to hear of your loss. This is a beautiful post in his honor! Sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with your dad growing up. I know it is difficult today, but you sound like you are very strong and remembering the great times you had. It is so sweet that you bake him a cake each year. I am sure he is looking down proud of his daughter with a big smile saying thank you!

  2. I did not read it all only skimmed because its sad and I know it. I am sorry for your loss. Stopping by front he Alexa hop. We just lost my husbands father and I am sad just thinking about losing mine as I know those days come all too soon.