And the tears fall

The house is quiet and still. The only sound I hear is the gentle snoring of my beautiful guardians, Lily and Watson.
They don't like it when I cry and are usually all over me trying to make me stop. Tonight though, they are worn out from running in the snow and having left over turkey.

I thought of listening to some music, but, today, all the songs are just making me miss you more. I try to close my eyes to sleep but, I just play your memory over and over. Usually, thinking of you makes me smile, but, not tonight. No, tonight, my heart is hurting so badly for you!

I wonder how my heart still beats when I am so broken and empty inside. I want to heal and be whole again but how can I when you were always what completed me.

I relive the days over and over in my head trying so hard to change the outcome. I try to think of changing something so that I will wake from this nightmare and find you beside me.

What happened to the girl you loved so much? The one who's laugh filled a room and eyes twinkled as she teased others?
I feel unwanted and so very lost. I think that if I work, I may find myself again, but, I can't even find a job that wants me.

You were always an angel to me. I am confused to why you had to leave me to become an angel to all. I am selfish and want you back!

Who is going to hold me and tell me that I am beautiful even if I gained weight or cut my hair? Who is going to make me laugh when I burn the supper or trip up the stairs? Who is going to sing Beatle songs with me? Who is going to laugh so hard with me that we fall down exhausted!

And as the tears fall, who will be able to kiss them away!

Love Yourself

I recently read an article about diet trends for 2013. I was pretty shocked that Nutrisystem was not listed, so I posted a comment to the website. I really was quite upset that Nutrisystem wasn't listed since that seems to be what works for me.
Not only am I losing weight steadily, I am also breathing easier and have gotten more energy.
So, I am giving a shout out to Nutrisystem! I have not always been overweight, due to PTSD, I just didn't seem to notice how unhealthy I became. Nutrisystem is a very healthy and effective way to lose weight safely and to keep it off. I find the support to be solid and the staff is always there to answer any questions or to help you through any tough spots.
You can follow Nutrisystem through so many sites that there is never any trouble getting the support that you need!


1. Nutrisystem Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/Nutrisystem

2. @Nutrisystem Twitter: http://twitter.com/Nutrisystem

3. Nutrisystem You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/Nutrisystem

4. Nutrisystem Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/nutrisysteminc/

5. Nutrisystem Google+: https://plus.google.com/b/107083288279617410657/107083288279617410657/posts


In our fast paced life, where we opt to eat at fast food restaurants to grab a quick bite to fill a hunger, isn't the best choice for a healthy meal and often leaves you hungry again very quickly and also craving more.
With Nutrisystem, not only have I found the meals very tasty, they are also very filling. They are even bars that you can grab for a quick breakfast or lunch on the go, or even as a snack if you are out and about and need a quick something to keep your energy up.
I know there are a lot of fad diet trends out there that promise a quick weight loss. But, why sacrifice your health, do yourself a favor and just try Nutrisystem for a month... Your body will thank you!
My journey to a healthier life style is Thanks to NUTRISYSTEM. I invite you to come along with me for mutual support. If you would also like to join NutriSystem, either click any where you see their name and it will link you right to their site!
Please visit Nutrisystem at www.nutrisystem.com/nsblog or you can also call them @ 1-888-853-4689 and join the Nutrisystem family too!!
Disclosure: I am receiving free Nutrisystem products and services (yay!!) in exchange for my participation and honest review of the program!I

Hugs For the Holidays

We are in the blessings of the holidays. The time when your hearts should be so full of love and joy and yet there are so many of us who hurt more during this time. There are so so many lonely and heart broken people around the world who can't be with their loved ones, a mom missing her babies and husband( or wife) as she is away in the service protecting us. Or the military man who has just left home for the first time and in his parents eyes, he is still just their baby and yet he is also fighting others to keep us safe.
So many out of work, and unable to purchase gifts for anyone. Barely enough to even put on a special dinner. These people so need our kindness and our prayers.
This year, like so many of them it seems, my heart is aching along with so many others. I pray for everyone that have lonely heartaches, but, especially this time of year. It seems so much colder and so much lonelier when you are missing someone.
It breaks my heart to see or hear people arguing out in the stores. If only they understood how desperately so many of us would wish they had their parents, children or spouses near. We would hug them so tightly, there surely wouldn't be any arguing.

Even with a heart full of sorrow, I can still find wonderment in the tree lights and music floating in the air. The excitement on the little one's faces as they get a glimpse of Santa in the store.

To me, this is a time of hope! My heart still is filled with kindness and love when seeing the Salvation Army ringing their bells and hoping for just a bit of change and a kind greeting instead of rushing past trying not to make eye contact with them.

I reflect on the gifts that God blessed me with. The (sometimes unspoken) love of family and friends. The times that were happy and special that warm my heart on cold lonely nights.
I am blessed with 6 siblings and all of their families that even distance can't change the love that we feel for each other.

This time of year seems to bring smiles quicker and hopefully forgiveness. If you are angry at someone, release it. Give it to God! He will help you. ( For those of you who don't believe, please know that I HAVE to believe! I HAVE to believe in Heaven or my mind would snap. I HAVE to believe that my husband, parents etc are having Christmas in Heaven. Surrounded by the little ones that left us too early. I see them singing songs and laughing and dancing around the most beautiful tree ever. That they are even luckier that they are able to sit not on Santa's lap, but, to sit on the lap of Jesus as He laughs and sings with them. I HAVE to know that they are all wishing nothing but happiness for us.

I wish for all of you a very special and loving holiday that is filled with many gifts that you feel more than see! I wish you warmth in the cold. Giggles and gentle touches. Winks and hand holding. Smiles and deep belly laughter that truly comes from the heart. I pray you find forgiveness in your hearts and a dance in your step.

I send all of you my hugs and love! Have a great week. Be kind to yourself! But, especially be kind to others. Hold a door, let the car in front of you turn, smile and give someone a touch on the back.

I also have a very special holiday wish to my friends in Nutrisytem, without you, I would have never made it this far! Please visit them at www.nutrisystem.com and give yourself or someone you love the gift of a healthier life.
Nutrisytem had sponsored me and this holiday, I am happy to be 23 pounds lighter!!! It is so easy to do and the food is scrumptious!

Hugs for The Holidays

We are in the blessings of the holidays. The time when your hearts should be so full of love and joy and yet there are so many of us who hurt more during this time. There are so so many lonely and heart broken people around the world who can't be with their loved ones, a mom missing her babies and husband( or wife) as she is away in the service protecting us. Or the military man who has just left home for the first time and in his parents eyes, he is still just their baby and yet he is also fighting others to keep us safe.
So many out of work, and unable to purchase gifts for anyone. Barely enough to even put on a special dinner.  These people so need our kindness and our prayers.
This year, like so many of them it seems, my heart is aching along with so many others.  I pray for everyone that have lonely heartaches, but, especially this time of year. It seems so much colder and so much lonelier when you are missing someone.
It breaks my heart to see or hear people arguing out in the stores. If only they understood how desperately so many of us would wish they had their parents, children or spouses near. We would hug them so tightly, there surely wouldn't be any arguing.

Even with a heart full of sorrow, I can still find wonderment in the tree lights and music floating in the air.  The excitement on the little one's faces as they get a glimpse of Santa in the store.

To me, this is a time of hope! My heart still is filled with kindness and love when seeing the Salvation Army ringing their bells and hoping for just a bit of change and a kind greeting instead of rushing past trying not to make eye contact with them.
 
I reflect on the gifts that God blessed me with.  The (sometimes unspoken) love of family and friends. The times that were happy and special that warm my heart on cold lonely nights.
I am blessed with 6 siblings and all of their families that even distance can't change the love that we feel for each  other.

This time of year seems to bring smiles quicker and hopefully forgiveness. If you are angry at someone, release it. Give it to God! He will help you.  ( For those of you who don't believe, please know that I HAVE to believe! I HAVE to believe in Heaven or my mind would snap. I HAVE to believe that my husband, parents etc are having Christmas in Heaven. Surrounded by the little ones that left us too early. I see them singing songs and laughing and dancing around the most beautiful tree ever. That they are even luckier that they are able to sit not on Santa's lap, but, to sit on the lap of Jesus as He laughs and sings with them. I HAVE to know that they are all wishing nothing but happiness for us.
 
I wish for all of you a very special and loving holiday that is filled with many gifts that you feel more than see! I wish you warmth in the cold. Giggles and gentle touches. Winks and hand holding. Smiles and deep belly laughter that truly comes from the heart. I pray you find forgiveness in your hearts and  a dance in your step.
 
I send all of you my hugs and love! Have a great week. Be kind to yourself! But, especially be kind to others. Hold a door, let the car in front of you turn, smile and give someone a touch on the back.

I also have a very special holiday wish to my friends in Nutrisytem, without you, I would have never made it this far! Please visit them at www.nutrisystem.com and give yourself or someone you love the gift of a healthier life.
Nutrisytem had sponsored me and this holiday, I am happy to be 23 pounds lighter!!! It is so easy to do and the food is scrumptious!

Minus 22.8 Pounds and Counting

I made it through Thanksgiving without over eating too much and I skipped the dessert!! In fact, I actually lost again this week!!! I am down now a total of 22.8 pounds. Yup yup yup!!! It is still coming off and steadily! 

Okay, when you have a lot to lose, 22.8 pounds is just a drop in the bucket, but, if you don't think that is a lot of extra weight to carry around, go into the store and pick up a 20 pound bag of pet food and walk around with that for a day. It is difficult to do even for a half an hour.
I would never have made it without my Nutrisystem! They are there for me to answer questions and give support if I ever need them and the food, well, I just love it!!!
There is an amazing chocolate muffin for breakfast that  really satisfies my chocolate craving. It is luscious! I even heat it up in the microwave for a few seconds and oh my goodness. There is also a cinnamon roll that tastes anything but diet! Amazing!
There are so many different foods to choose from that it can be difficult to decide what to eat that day!
That would be the only tough thing about  Nutrisystem, deciding what to eat that day. I can not believe how easy this is and the weight is really coming off!
I love Nutrisystem and believe in them so much, that I actually want to lose all my unhealthy weight and work for them.

I remember what it was like to be thin. I know how differently some people treat you when you are round. Some people are down right mean. Which surely doesn't help the depression part that some overweight people have. 

I am even enjoying exercise! In fact, today, I went to my niece Tiffany (also on Nutrisystem) and we did her Wii fit today and I even did a couple of songs on the Michael Jackson experience. So much fun!! You can also follow her progress HERE http://bookcoverjustice.blogspot.com/

I have a long way to go, but, I am doing it! It can be done! Please, if you have weight to lose, I would love for you to try Nutrisystem and see just how easy it is to lose that unhealthy poundage without feeling deprived! 

The holidays are now upon us which usually means seeing friends and family, which can bring along  eating and drinking things that aren't always a good choice. I have to admit, I wanted to start Nutrisystem after the holidays so that I could still indulge myself in the unhealthy foods that I thought I wanted.  But, now, I am so thankful that I started a couple months back because now I really think about what is going into my mouth! I am now proud of my choices, own I fill up on raw veggies and fruits, I have cut way back on my diet coke and my drink water for the most part. I even feel more energized and there is something else, I BELIEVE! I Believe that I will succeed!!!

So, here is to a great healthy week end with plenty of fresh air, exercise, water and good food choices!!

My journey to a healthier life style is  Thanks  to NUTRISYSTEM.  I invite you to come along with me for mutual support. If you would also like to join NutriSystem, either click any where you see their name and it will link you right to their site!
Please visit Nutrisystem at www.nutrisystem.com/nsblog or you can also call them @ 1-888-853-4689 and join the  Nutrisystem family too!!

• Disclosure: I am receiving free Nutrisystem products and services (yay!!) in exchange for my participation and honest review of the program!I

You can also follow Nutrisystem  on Facebook,  @Nutrisystem on Twitter, as well as on any other  social media channels you are a part of (i.e. YouTube, Pinterest & Google+)

So Many Different Faces

Not a day goes by that we all don't face some type of choice.
What to wear, what kind of mood to express, highway, back roads, give the homeless person some money or some food, pay for some one else's toll, pay for a strangers lunch?
Is there something that you can do today to brighten up someone's life a little bit? A smile? A simple touch? A really tight hug?
So many choices. So many different faces to wear for others to see. What face are you showing?
I made a choice to be happy today. No matter the heartache that rips my soul apart; I will put on my happy face.
Today is the fifth anniversary of my husband becoming an angel. Like today, it was raining, which didn't surprise me because it rained when we met, our first date, and our wedding.
Taking the dogs outside today, I let the rain fall over me. I stood looking up into the sky and let my tears be mixed in the the raindrops from Heaven.
When someone you love so deeply is called Home, the grief never fades. It doesn't get better with time! Why do people say that? It just gets different. So very different. You lose friends and sometimes family that just can't seem to understand how you can still ache or they just don't know how to talk to you any more. Sometimes seeing you reminds them too much about their own pain.
Some things people say to try and "help" you through the grief are not helpful at all. For those of you who say "God won't give you anything you can't handle" Please for the love of God, STOP IT!!! It is NOT helpful.
How can you say that to a parent that has lost a child, to rape victims, or when someone's home burns down or gets foreclosed on. The last thing we want to hear is that.
For me, it made me question my faith! I am happy to say that I have regained or renewed my faith but its been a very hard road.
Today I want to focus on the good. I have gained hope again and new friendships. I have forgiven those that walked away from us. I have forgiven those that stole from us (at least I'm trying to😕).
Good things are starting to happen in our lives. My daughter's friend is getting married and wants my daughter to be with her do badly, she paid for my daughters cruise!!
Even though I am out of work, I have not had to worry about food, thanks to Meredith Bandy at Nutrisystem!
I have been given free products in order to write about my journey to becoming healthy!
So. Instead of eating foods that fill you but are so very unhealthy, Nutrisystem provides me with not only healthy and nutritious foods but it is extremely delushious! Yes, De-Lush-ious!! That's even yummier than delicious!
Am I hungry, ehhh sometimes, but, I make such better choices for a snack!
I am learning to stop eating when emotions take over. I let my emotions out for a little bit. I now exercise and have a goal again in my life!
My goal? Oh, I am going to be a success story for Nutrisystem and I want to work for them! I also want to be able to get my daughter on this wonderful program so that she too will become healthy and self confident. I want to be one of the girls in the commercials, I want to be an inspiration to someone. Someone who thinks there is no hope left!
Good things DO happen to good people!
So today, the choice I make is to be happy! Happy that I had such a wonderful husband and that he was such a great dad and friend to all those who knew him!
Happy that I am on the road to being heathy and happy that my faith has been renewed.
Will you also choose to be happy today? Please join me in becoming a better YOU!
Since I am posting from my phone it won't let me set you up with a link to Nutrisystem. Be good to yourself and go to www.nutrisystem.com and join! You will begin to feel hopeful again! There is no stress, everything is right there to help you! Counselors and new friends to help you through rough spots and celebrate your successes!
Trust me! It really works!! I am down 18 pounds!! Waaaahooooo!!
*discloser: I was given free product in exchange for my honest opinion. In no way am I told what to say. Your opinion may be different than mine, but, that is okay! That is what makes us unique and special. Today, remember YOU ARE SPECIAL and deserve to feel that way!! So, won't you please join me on the road to a healthier lifestyle?

Monday's Read ~ Enchanted By Starlight

 Enchanted By Starlight by Tina L. Hook

Publication Date: October 16, 2012





This enchanting story is set around three girls, Skylar ( love that name) Grace and Alaina.
Each girl has to find for herself her true meaning for enchantment through lives that are intertwined through envy, deception and love.
If you are one that wishes on stars when you look up into the sky, this is surely a book that you will find very difficult to put down! It is truly magic!
Bravo Miss Tina! Bravo!!!
The story take place Florida
Skylar, Grace and Alaina have magical powers that were given to them from comets. each a different comet, each a different gift.Sklylar wanted so badly to be someone important and not judged by the her clothes or small home. She grew up in a small home and couldn't wait to get away. She falls in love but, he just couldn't give her what she thought she needed.
Grace was very kind hearted and a devoted and true friend. She had a special power over men. She was unsure of herself. I think though, she may have been my favorite of the girls. She was kind and cared about her friends. 
That brings us to Alaina. I didn't like her. She really angered me. She was mean and spiteful and lived to ruin everything for Skylar.
I loved this book! I loved how the characters intertwined from early in life.  Once I picked it up, I just couldn't put it down.  I really enjoy that there was a magical twist to this book that sets it at the must read category!

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